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My Bio |
Greetings,I come from a land that is vast and free. It is where a man can fall on his face in a river and just drink. Deep and long, I drank from that discolored water. My dog, Snoopy followed me up and down those distant hills, until we could run no more. I then went to Elementary School, where I paid my way to be Validictorian. The warmer months then turned colder and the snow began to fall. It was a white Christmas. I then turned to the ways of my father. He was a burly and stout man with only one desire in the world. He wanted to cut trees. He was a lumberjack and he was O.K. Some day I hope to be just like him. I have two siblings that have grown up with me. I'm the one on the right with the fuzzy hand. I am flanked by Floyd and Sara-Ann. Floyd is the oldest, then Sara-Ann, and I'm the best-looking one of the bunch. In the year of our lord, 1998, I was baptised by Chester Chappell in a creek in Old Toxaway. Some of you might recognize me from the cartoon Scooby-Doo. Here is the rest of the gang. But after I graduated from High School, I did what I was put on this earth for. I enrolled at UNC-Asheville. It has been suggested by my friends to just say I went to UNC and leave it at that. But I think that the people should know the sweet horrible truth. I stayed in a rat-infested hole in the wall. While at college I met a few friends. We went to a wrestling event once where I got kicked out by Asheville's finest for throwing a paper cup at a wrestler. (I have to say that, although I tend to have bad aim, I did hit him in the back.) I felt as if I had to throw the cup though, because the were beating up on my main man, Ric Flair. "In order to be the man, you have to beat the man, and that's me. WOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" I actually graduated from UNCA in December of 1998. Immediately after graduating, I was hired on at SoftBase Systems. They welcomed me and supported everything I did. (By supported, I mean hindered.) I even had my own office. SoftBase soon moved to a new office building where I got another office, and was promptly kicked out of and put in a cubicle. Some of you might wonder why my former boss would let me go. All I can say is, "Freedom! Horrible, Horrible Freedom!" Right now, I'm doing the thing I love best, being a lumberjack.
-David
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